A very strange day
by Chrissy Almasy
Summary: Drama piece turned to attempt at humorous. Seifer POV as he stops Squall from committing suicide


The strangest thing happened today…

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, yadayada. (like anyone on this site does!) 

A/N: Right….This is one of those 'writing after midnight'-fics. It doesn't make sense. I really wanted this to be a dramatic piece, but the guys (Seifer and Squall) didn't agree with me and took the story into their own hands. You can flame me, but don't blame me! All bashing done in good humour (or at least I tried to). Anyway, try and enjoy…

The strangest thing happened today…

I made one last tour of the training centre, searching for underclassmen and students who were violating curfew. Since my return to Balamb Garden, I've been back at my old job as head of the Disciplinary Committee. With my own faithful posse, no less. Cid told me it was more to keep me in a place where they could see me –so I couldn't try anything sneaky like revenge, in case I planned to so- then that they really wanted me for the job. Still, it keeps me busy. And it gives the rest of the students and SeeDs a good reason to hate me. That way I can myself their behaviour has nothing to do with what I've done during the Sorceress War. Yeah, you can call it self-deceit, but it makes it all a little more bearable. 

Anyway, I had to shake off two grats and a new, shady type of monster they recently released before getting to my favourite fishing spot: the 'secret' area at the back of the training centre. As I silently entered, I felt a little annoyed when I noticed there was only one person there. Usually there two of three couples making out. Seeing their faces when I come crashing in always makes my day!

But no such luck this time. The single male figure is dark, some pieces of metal blinking in the lights that come from the Garden's elaborate crown. However, more interesting is the fact he's standing on the balcony's edge, leaving very little to the imagination as to what's going to happen next. And since I didn't feel like cleaning up the mess, I decided to cut in.

Okay, so maybe I _was_ actually concerned. Who cares, right?

"Not planning to play pancake on the sidewalk below, are you?" I inquired sarcastically.

The figure turned and made a disgruntle noise in my direction. It took my ears some time to decipher the muttering as "Go away, Seifer."

Truth be told, it seems like people in Garden think my first name is cursed. I don't know why, but everyone always insists on calling me Almasy these days. Mr. Almasy when they're afraid of me. Only a handful of people still call me what they always have. And one of those fit the description of the suicidal on the edge perfectly.

"What are you doing up that ledge, Squall?"

"…None o' your bleedin' business…" 

It's quite obvious my rival has picked up some lines from me. And some other habits, although he'll never consciously admit to that, but that's beside the point. The point is that he scared me. Standing on that ledge, as if he'll jump of at any given moment –which was obviously his intention of doing-, he scared me. "Don't tell me you're serious about this," I said, trying to hide my true feelings behind my usual mask of sarcastic arrogance. 

"Like you would care either way. The sooner I'm gone the better it is for you, ey? Well, your wish is about to be granted!"

I don't think I've ever moved so fast in my life. He didn't even jump. He just let himself fall over the edge, and still I managed to catch him before he went over completely. He was actually fighting me as I pulled him back on the balcony.

"That….was absolutely unnecessary!" I tell him firmly, sitting him down on the ground and propping him with his back against the wall, away from the edge. "What for Hyne's sake was that all about?!"

Squall was silent as he looked away. That's nothing new for him. He always acts that way. But usually he doesn't cry when he does. Strangest thing about it, though, was that I actually touched me.

I felt something that was new to me. It wasn't pity. I still hate pity, especially self-pity. It's the reason I never considered finishing myself after I got defeated by Squall and his gang. Okay, I thought about it, but I never _seriously_ considered it….Okay, so I did. But I never actually did it. Now drop the subject!

But Squall had seriously considered committing suicide and had come to the conclusion he should actually do it. My question was 'why?'. 

So I asked.

"What would you care…" he muttered again, whipping his eyes with the back of his hand. 

"It's pretty obvious to me that I care." I tried not to sound too harsh. He was crying and suicidal already. No need to make it worse. "If I didn't, I would've just let you drop to your death."

"I wish you had…"

"No you don't. You're happy you're still alive, but you just don't know it yet." Sorry, I couldn't think of a better line than that. But at least it made Squall smile. A somewhat humourless and forced smile, but a smile nonetheless. 

"So what's the occasion?" I asked him. "Depression? Financial problem? Too many responsibilities? Too little sex? Zell?"

He chuckled coldly. "None of the above." Then he sighed and pulled his knees to his chin, wrapping his arms around them. "It's…. it's about Rinoa."

"Rinoa?" I could hardly believe my ears. The sweetest -if not the most intelligent- girl in the world and he would kill him self because of her. "I don't get it. Are you madly in love with her, so much it hurts, so you decided to end the pain yourself?" Hey, I'm a romantic guy, remember? 

Squall looked like he saw Shiva and Ifrit go on a date together. "…not quite…" he finally said. "It's more like.. hell, why do I even bother telling you…"

"Because there's no one else around right now and you really need to get this off your chest before you decide to jump again. That good enough?"

Squall stared blankly at me, then raised his brows. "Quistis is giving you personality training as part of your rehabilitation program?"

I nodded.

"Though as much."

So he was cracking his pathetic excuse for a joke at my expense. So what? At least he was trying to be something near humorous, which meant he was less likely to try to jump off again.

Now I can imagine many people wondering why I would actually _care_ is Squall killed himself, since we're rivals and are supposed not to be able to stand each other's guts. Well, picture this: you're a Garden Faculty and you see the Garden Commander plummeting to his death, ending in a smear on the ground floor. When you look up to see where he came crashing down from, you see a _very_ high balcony and just this blonde guy glancing over the edge to see where this 'best buddy' has gone off to. _No one_ is gonna believe I _didn't_ throw, pushed or shoved him over! And Squall –the only witness- ain't around to tell everyone he jumped himself. So I'm not going sappy, I'm just practising self-preservation here. Got it now? Good.

Anyway, Squall is still sitting in front of me, face still wet with tears and still looking generally miserable. 

"Okay, so you want to kill yourself off because of Rinoa, right?"

He nodded and started sobbing again.

"So what did she do to make you go all bubbly over her?"

"….."

"Well? Spit it out? I saved your life. I'm at least entitled to know what you were trying to get away from."

"……"

I'm notorious for my demanding gaze –ahem- and it's effect was no less on Squall. Finally he whispered, eyes locked on his feet:

"…she….dumped me…"

I took a deep breath. Of course, the oldest reason in the book. Giving it my best shot at compassion –homework for next Tuesday's personality training-, I put my hand on his shoulder and told him firmly yet gently that there were dozens more girls like Rinoa, adding the fact that I had some practical experience with that, too.

"But…. she left you for me," Squall sobbed.

"….not quite. She left me because summer camp was over and there were green pastures to move on to, or something like that. But that's of no importance right now." I took grabbed him at both shoulders now and shook him, a little harder than was absolutely necessary.

"Squall! Open your eyes and look at the world! So what if Rinoa ran off with another guy? There's a whole planet full of women waiting for you. You've got money, power, the status of a hero! Women will fall in swarms at your feet! You're free too choose! Go ahead and take your freedom!"

Man, I definitely have to quit seeing that shrink Cid sent me to. 

Squall, looking very dazed by all the shaking, was trying to get his eyes to focus again. "Seifer…"

"Yeah?"

"She didn't run off with a guy."

"So?"

"She ran off with Quistis…"

There are some days you wish you had just stayed in bed…

A/N: Told ya it didn't make sense… My retaliation for all the fics written where either Seifer or Squall –preferably both- turn out to be gay ^_~.Please R&R. Be gentle. I've written many a fic in my time, but never one as idiotic as this.


End file.
